just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize