I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize