Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize