I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
