I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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