whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
