there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize