at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
