she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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