Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
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