some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
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