May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
