Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize