Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
