oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
