Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
