In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
