I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
