Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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