If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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