dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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