1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize