the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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