My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
