I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Damn victory sex feels great
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize