I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
