I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
