We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
