god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
