can we get nightvision for the apartment?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
