So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
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