THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
