My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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