so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
