you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Randomize
