do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
