Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
