Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Randomize
