so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
