oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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