i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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