You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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