wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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