party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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