you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
This house was built for laser tag.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
