You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Randomize
