my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
