3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
We just shotgunned beers for America
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
