i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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