the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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